Cosmos: 

Welcome back to the show, my fellow extraordinary Americans. Today’s guest is Sabrina Osso. Sabrina is the founder and CEO of Ossosafe.com. Feel Safe where you live, learn, work, and play. 

She’s a TEDx speaker, author, dancer, and real estate agent who prioritizes creating and maintaining respect in homes, workplaces, and schools. She combines education and technology through her core product, the OSSO Safe certification for properties, which entails the OSSO Safe Home sweet home package for the real estate industry. Also, part of the certification includes the children’s book Home Safe Home for you and me. It serves as a tool for both children and adults alike and lays the groundwork for respect and safety. She’s also a professional dancer and teacher who uses her performance skills to educate others about the subject. 

The Women’s Federation for World Peace awarded Sabrina the March 2024 Her Story Award for her commitment to protecting children from domestic violence and fostering positive family relationships. As a real estate agent, Sabrina is bringing the real estate industry to OSSO Safe. She’s an extraordinary American, and I’m glad to have her on the show. Sabrina, thank you so much for taking the time to be here.

Sabrina Osso: 

Thank you so much, Cosmos. It’s such a pleasure.

Cosmos: 

Sabrina, can you tell me a little more about yourself, your background, your story, and how you got started?

Sabrina Osso: 

Again, thank you for the opportunity to be on your platform and podcast. Oh, so Safe was born out of a one-woman show that I wrote, choreographed, and performed. But I, I should say on your podcast that I am a survivor of violence myself. My father beat my mother regularly. My mother would beat me. 

I know firsthand how traumatic it is to live in that type of environment. As I was saying, Safe is born of a one-woman show called Home Sweet Home. And I play different women being abused. She goes to her good place. That’s where the dancing comes in. But then she’s pulled back into the terror of violence. The show ends strongly and is empowering. I conducted extensive research for the show Cosmos and was surprised by the statistics I found. 

I said to myself, I need to make this into a bona fide business, with products and services that could really help. And that’s how oh-so-Safe was born. Basically, turning pain into power.

I hope I answered the question.

Cosmos: 

I just wanted to get a little bit more interested. I know you found it safe, and you gave a little bit of background about you being a survivor of violence. 

What do you think was the catalyst or basically the motivational factor that drove you forward despite all the obstacles to continue this over the years?

Sabrina Osso: 

Yes, good question. I would say we, at the core of what we do, are kids, kids, children of all ages. And we really, I personally feel, feel a lot for them, and I know how much they’re suffering, especially in America, but I mean around the world. 

But I live on the East Coast, so I feel that children. I wish I had had my own products and services growing up, because if I had, my mother and father would not have gotten away with half the things they did. I believe my business is needed throughout. We have ambitious plans to make respect a required standard in all homes, nationally and internationally, and it is very hard to sustain. It’s not easy. It’s very challenging. We’re not a nonprofit. We are a business, an llc. We respect all of the non-profits that deal with domestic violence, but we feel that that is the wrong approach. 

The epidemic of violence, abuse, chaos, and dysfunction in the home is not going to be resolved by holding a bucket and waiting for donations to drop in that bucket. When people pay for services, the issue is resolved. 

It’s a different mindset, which is why we’re focusing on the real estate industry. Because that’s if your home is safe, meaning that respect is practiced every day, well, everything else will fall into place. There would be no school shootings. There would be no public violence. There would be no shootings in a mall. There would be no violence, abuse, chaos, or dysfunction in so many ways.

If we nip it in the bud, solve it in residency in your home, then I think that a lot of other crimes, if you will, will just fall away—drug trafficking, weapons, sex trafficking, all of it. So, children are at the core of what we do. I could discuss this further, as my children’s book is a staple in properties. I hope I answered the question.

Cosmos: 

I know that you’re multifaceted and you’re a real estate agent, and you’re also into dancing and all that. Combine all of this. How did you combine everything into something comprehensive, resulting in what Ossosafe.com has become?

Sabrina Osso: 

Yes, it’s taken time, and I’ve had several business coaches who guide me. I believe that, as a real estate agent, I have access to a wide range of resources. I have databases of landlords and tenants, property owners, property managers, superintendents, mortgage companies, and insurance companies. Since we’re resolving this right in your home, it’s treated as another service, which makes sense. 

And I thought long and hard about how I wanted to create my business. And we, we say, look, not all the victims are female. There are plenty of male victims out there. Not all abusers are male. There are plenty of female abusers there. 

We’re very open-minded in that regard. Where we don’t say, oh, we only help women, or we, you know, we discount any, any, any, any men’s suffering. Not at all. We’re very realistic about your home and what constitutes a safe, respectful home. That’s the key ingredient: respect. 

As I mentioned, children are very important. So, they suffer the most. I should know. I was one of them. Regarding dancing, I am a dancer. I started dancing late because I could not even mention the word “dance” in my household. It was very taboo. When you live in that type of environment of chaos, of dysfunction, yelling, screaming, my parents beating the crap out of each other. 

As a child, you’re so traumatized, and your life is stolen. It’s basically stolen because you’re always worried about what’s going to happen today. What is going to happen tonight? Are the police going to come? Do I have to call the police? Is Mom going to be pushed down the stairs? Is Dad going to ask me, why did you give your mother money? All of these things, you know, are really problems that no one should have, let alone a child. As I said, I started dancing late, but I had teachers who really propelled me onto the fast track, and I was very focused. 

And when you’re talking about a taboo subject such as home violence, when you add the performance arts aspect, it makes it more palatable. Like, I’ve had students come up to me and say, oh my gosh, you played my mother. You played me. You really understand where I’m coming from. And it’s because of the dancing. And I do all styles of dance. I perform ballet, jazz, theater, Latin, hip-hop, swing, and African.

I do all sorts of styles to connect with all students, no matter where they come from, no matter their nationality, religion, if you will, you know, wherever they come from. I try to offer a variety of dance styles so they can see themselves in one of my staff members performing or in me.

Cosmos: 

Sabrina, one of the things that I wanted to know from all of this, because I know you’ve been through a lot of pain, right? 

And, but you also mentioned that you can turn pain into power. And for the audience’s sake. There are many people in this audience who might have gone through traumatic experiences, or they’ve gone through pain in their lives, whether it’s mental or emotional pain. 

From your perspective, how do you turn your emotional or other types of pain into power and empower yourself in your life?

Sabrina Osso: 

Excellent question. There are several points, and I include them in my children’s book. This is very difficult, but not impossible, because I’m doing it and incorporating it into my daily life. Conscious breathing is very important. Like you and I are breathing right now, but what I’m talking about is very involuntary—conscious breathing. 

For example, if you take a deep breath through your nose and hold it at the top for like five seconds. And then you release through your mouth everything you feel. My shoulders drop, and my heart rate slows. I. And you do a few of those in a row. You anchor yourself to the present moment. 

Right now, you hear my voice; I’m hearing your voice. Maybe there’s some background noise, the computer’s running, the lights are on, and that’s it. You’re not thinking about the past, you’re not thinking about the future. You are anchored to the present moment, and it calms you, which I was never able to do in my house. 

Everything was so, like, living with the terrorists. Living with some, with people that, as I said, yelling and screaming, and just like you’re always anxious and panicked. So to learn this, breathing is very helpful. And you can do that at any time, every time you feel overwhelmed. You have deadlines, you have projects, and you’re like, “Oh my gosh, I’m scared.” Wow. I started dating someone, and this is not a good situation. I’m so undecided. Breathe. 

Do those breathing exercises, and you’ll start to see clearly. And if, even if you don’t have an answer right then and there, just wait, keep doing the breathing. Let a day or two pass; answers will come to you. Another thing is that, as helpful as you and I are, everyone deserves to be in a good relationship. So that means that you shouldn’t have to deal with violence, abuse, chaos, or dysfunction in any capacity. Not verbal abuse, not physical abuse, not sexual abuse, not emotional, mental abuse, none of it. 

There are plenty of warning signs that your partner, or even a friendship, is not a friend, I mean, if someone is bullying you in any capacity, that’s not a friend, that’s not a partner. So, you need to know the warning signs. So, I like to tell people that. We educate on the warning signs in our oh-so-safe certification for properties to arm people before incidents occur or as they unfold. Like, oh my gosh, this is what I learned in the seminar or in the workshop. I have to end this relationship with this person right away. I’m endangering myself. We are strong proponents of good therapy. 

Any way you can get to a therapist will be very helpful. Whether online, in person, via text, or by phone. Because a therapist is a third person, you don’t know them, and they don’t know you. 

When you start describing your situation, a good fit will help you identify key points. Like they, for example, there’s a lot of cultures where, oh, it’s normal to be beaten by your partner. It’s normal to be yelled at, but a therapist will help you recognize it. Look, I respect that you’re Hindu, Jewish, Catholic, Christian, or Muslim. I respect your nationality, wherever you come from. You’re Portuguese, you’re Pakistani, you’re Brazilian, you’re Italian, German, whatever. But what you just described to me, well, that’s abuse. 

And you deserve to be in a good relationship, a healthy relationship for you and especially your children, because your children are going to see you fighting, hitting, punching, and that’s what they’re going to learn. That’s normal. What needs to be normal is respect, boundaries, positivity, empowerment, encouragement, freedom, choice, and safety. Oh, so safe. So, I hope I answered the question. 

Cosmos: 

You’re definitely helping with understanding pain, going to a therapist, and everything.

But the question is, to empower, let’s say, somebody who’s going through, like a dark time, right? And they’re, they’re the nadir or the lowest point of their life. But they want to transform that darkness into power, into empowerment in their lives.

I know, therapy, going to a therapist, and being conscious, your breathing is there, but what are the other ways and tactics you can use to turn around your emotions and your thoughts around things basically?

Sabrina Osso: 

Yes. As I mentioned, a therapist can definitely help you with that. Because if they’re, if they’re a good fit for you, they will make you aware of ways that you can empower yourself, whether it be, if it’s a good fit. Taking yoga, meditation, or maybe doing an activity that you normally wouldn’t do, but maybe you’ll meet somebody really good, would make a good friend or a good partner. 

And to kind of get out of your head, you know, to get out of your head, because we really have a lot of noise in our heads, negative talk. A therapist can help you develop the habit of talking to yourself positively. What we like, or what I like. And I encourage this with people. There’s a spiritual leader who’s also an author. He’s written many books. He has conducted many workshops. Eckhart Tolle. I follow him.

Cosmos: 

I read a couple of his books—my favorite authors.

Sabrina Osso: 

I really like him. And in fact, what I said in the beginning about anchoring yourself to the present moment and just staying present, I learned from him, actually listening to him. And you said, like, what if you’re at your lowest point? Because I was suicidal from 16 to 19 years old. Amazingly, I’m here. 

I went through the advice of a friend who cried with me. And I, she was the only one that I told everything that was going on in my house. And she cried with me. And she said, ” Sabrina, you need therapy. And I said, ” But why, why do I have to go to a therapist? It’s my parents who are the ones who are messed up, who are violent and abusive. And she said to me, yeah, but if you go to therapy, you’ll be helping them. At the time, that resonated with me. 

I visited a university campus. It was free. It was part of the tuition. And I was scared. I was, like, what if somebody sees me? All the noise, right. But I went anyway, and it helped a lot. But I was suicidal. They wanted to put me on medication. They wanted to, you know, and we’re talking about a lot, a good time ago, and now every. Everybody’s medicated. And I really wish they wouldn’t do that. That doesn’t resolve anything. Medication, it’s kind of just. It numbs you and pushes the problem aside, but you’re not addressing it. You have to face it, you know, and that’s what a therapist can help with.

But Eckhart Tolle said something that I find very interesting. And he said, ” If you’re thinking about suicide or even if you’ve attempted suicide, he says. He said this: “Die now by surrendering to the present moment.” When I first heard that, I asked, “What is he talking about?” What? But I really like that. 

And he says in the video, it’s on YouTube, one of his many, many videos. Don’t try to change anything. You’re at your lowest point. You’re scared, you’re panicked. You are just at the end, you’re beneath the end. Let it be, okay? Die now instead of committing suicide. I’m high. He says, I highly recommend surrender. Just surrender to the present moment. Don’t try to change it. Don’t. And he’s not saying, ” Don’t make your life better. He’s just saying right now, you can’t get out of bed. You can’t even brush your teeth. You want to shower—You’re going through a divorce, or you’re about to lose your kids, or you’re just dying now by surrendering to what is. 

I practice that. Ah. And it. It’s one of the things that really helps me because, instead of trying to fix everything, you’re human. You’re not Superwoman. You’re not Superman. You’re human.

You can’t do everything. And he. By saying that, he is surrendering to the present moment. Die now. He’s letting it be okay. That. Don’t. Don’t do anything. You don’t have to do anything. Just surrender to the present moment, as much pain, as much panic, fear, and anxiety. I feel like that’s helped me a lot—just him. And I have to hear it over and over again. I have it saved on my phone, actually. 

And I don’t know, it just gives me some peace. And it gets me. And it gets me through. And I advise others as well. And, yeah, so, and, and you know, turning pain into power, it’s not just one thing, it’s many things, and it’s your day-to-day life. I’ve been with my partner for a long time, and we are like. My therapist would tell me, Sabrina, you’re acting like your parents. 

You don’t want to do that. And when she would say that to me, I would stop in my tracks. You know, I was never abusive, but certain things that I do, like, I would always try, I always fight with him when really there’s nothing to fight about. But because I’m so programmed, because my parents fought every day, all day long, you’re programmed. 

When she would say that to me, Sabrina, you’re acting like your parents, I would stop the fighting with him, and I would just journal, like focus on the positive, and remember who we are as individuals and as a couple. So it’s very empowering to do that.

Cosmos: 

Sabrina, one of the key points you mentioned is Eckhart Tolle. I love this author and read one of his books, A New Earth, right? He then discussed understanding the present moment and recognizing that you’re the awareness behind your awareness, which means you must step back from your emotions and thoughts. 

I’m a practitioner of yoga and meditation, right? So I do yoga and meditation regularly. And when you combine Eckhart Tolle’s ideology and the concept, and you also talked about, like, death and everything, right? When I read that book, I thought about how life is so temporary and that, when we die, we forget everything we know. 

And then what matters is the present moment. Many people are stuck in the past and the future. But if you can, as you mentioned, surrender to the present moment and master your thoughts and emotions, you cannot control the severity of the environment. What you can control is how you’re responding to it. And that’s one of the most empowering and profound things I’ve learned over the years, along with what I’ve learned from his book.

Sabrina Osso: 

Yeah, I have to read that book. I have to read it. I’ve been listening to his videos. I respond more to videos lately because I feel like he’s with me, like he’s talking to me. So I’m so glad that you echo that, you know, with Eckhart Tolle, and he’s not pretentious at all. He’s just very practical, and you know, and I, he has like a, a sub, not a sub platform, but it sounds true, like a series sounds true. And everything that he says, it’s just, yeah, truth, like what you said, like we’re here temporarily. And when you pass, that’s it, you know, it, it’s, we don’t know what’s going to happen. 

The thing is, and you know, when you live through violence, abuse, chaos, and dysfunction, it isn’t easy to think we’re here temporarily. Let’s make the best of it, take it day by day. It’s very difficult to do that when you live with a terrorist, and that, and that’s usually your parent, an abusive, violent, chaotic, dysfunctional parent who’s verbally, physically, and sexually abusing you. It’s impossible to do that. You’re just trying to survive. 

And I want to say, see, I don’t advise, I mean, like, to your listeners, I could tell them, hire a lawyer, go through the courts, call child protective services, go in front of the courts. But I can tell you they’re horrible. The courts are horrible. And I’m speaking from personal and professional experience. They make horrible matters even worse. 

I swear, these courts, especially these judges, they force children, abuse children to stay, remain with their abusive parents, abusive step parents, even when there is an aunt, an uncle, a grandparent, a close family friend that is saying, I’ll take care of the kid or check me, do a background check, and the child wants to go to that person willingly, the judge will rule in favor of the abusive parent, abusive step parent in most, if not all cases.

Cosmos: 

Oh, wow.

Sabrina Osso: 

We feel confident in our products and services. You won’t need the courts, you won’t need them, forget about them. And I have to say, child protective services in this country are horrible, horrible. You’re better off not calling them. They are a useless, incompetent, ignorant, and unqualified agency. 

And I know what I’m talking about. I’ve been through it. I know plenty of people who have been through it. They, and it’s just what I say in my TEDX talk. They embolden abusive parents and child victims over and over again, even in cases where pornography and BDSM are going on in the household.

So don’t even bother calling them. Don’t even waste your time, money, and energy calling them. Hire us to get the property also safe-certified. We’ll get everybody educated. Everybody signs the policy, and therapists are assigned to the property. We have an app that detects violent movements, captures them in real time, and issues alerts. It’s being improved upon right now. Children in an OSO Safe-certified property have a voice and choice. 

If they say after several months of living in a property that is also safe-certified, that it is safe for several weeks or several days, they are lying. For example, they lie. No, no, no. I’m safe with my parents. 

But we know at OSO Safe that abusive parents, abusive step-parents, can only keep their poker face on for so long. Sooner or later, those abusive true colors will come out. During our seminar review, we read the book to them. Who do you feel safe with? Little Timmy, little Sally? Is it Mom and Dad? If it’s not mom and dad, who do you feel safe with? Is it an aunt, an uncle, a grandparent, or a close family friend? If you’re not ready to say it right now, that’s okay. If you’re not ready, that’s okay. But say you’re also safe. Kids cheer. I want to live where I am. Oh, so safe. And I am also safe. Fill in the blank. We’ll get you to that person. 

If dad and mom and stepmom and stepdad, they’re hitting you, they’re beating you, they’re punching you, they put you down. No. Unacceptable. We’ll connect you with an aunt, uncle, grandparent, or close family friend. If they have no one, we advise them to be patient. We’re working as fast as we can. We’re going. We’re doing everything we can to keep you safe and respected in your home.

Cosmos: 

That is amazing. Sabrina. I appreciate the work you are all doing.

And, I know you had a TEDx event where, like, you talked about just, like, violence and just a bunch of other important matters. Could you tell the audience a bit more about your TEDx talk and its topic?

Sabrina Osso: 

Sure, sure. Yeah, I’m so grateful that my hair stylist at the time at Super Cuts, she was a student at New Jersey City University, and she had told me, Sabrina, my university is hosting a TEDx, why don’t you apply? Because she knew about me and, oh, so safe. She loved everything we stand for and the work we’re doing. And I said, ” Sure, why not? 

I filled out the application. It was a simple application. I received a quick response indicating I would be an alternate. After a couple of days, I was selected. So I was one of the eight at New Jersey City University. And they had us rehearse, you know, and the theme was Past, present, and future. Something about the past, present, and future, I don’t remember. But the title of my. They wanted titles and content that were unique, usually, you know, for TEDx or TED talks. 

Because TED stands for technology, entertainment, and design, I believe. So, my title I chose is if you’re a victim of home violence, don’t leave, stay. And they liked that a lot. They thought that was very avant-garde and counter to what people are always told, right? If you’re in an unsafe environment, leave. You, you go. Take the kids and go, whether you’re male or female. But we’re looking to turn all of that around because our whole premise is: why should you leave? You’re the victim. You stay right where you are. It’s the abuser who has to go and never come back. So. And they liked all of that. 

It was a wonderful experience and very professional. The TEDx crew was there. The cameras, the lighting, the. They set it all up. And, yeah, there was a good number of people who came to listen in person. And I did that in April of 2018. And it was one of the most gratifying experiences of my life. And I remember when I finished my talk, a man yelled out. He was clapping. I don’t know. To this day, I don’t know who it was, but he said he screamed, ” Bravo. And yeah, yeah, it was so great. And, my, the woman who cuts my hair, Natasha, she was there. 

And it got heard by students, professors, and other professionals in the education industry, if you will, the education environment. And, yeah, yeah. So it was great. It was great. I’m so grateful.

Cosmos: 

No, this is amazing.

Sabrina, are there any other projects that OSASAFE or you’re working on that you’d like the audience to see?

Sabrina Osso: 

Yes. I mean, I mentioned that we are looking to make oh-so-safe certifications a required standard. Respect. Making respect, the required standard. All homes. So that means taking it. Right now, we’re in the tri-state area. And we want to take this national and international. We’re speaking to mortgage and insurance companies to say, “Look, partner with us.” Let’s establish a partnership where landlords and property owners, including property managers, and even those who own their own property, can get their properties also safe-certified; their insurance rates will go down. Their property value will go up because they are taking steps to make the property and the people in it safe, in terms of no violence, no abuse, no chaos, no dysfunction. 

And that is all replaced with positivity, empowerment, encouragement, freedom, choice, respect, and safety. Because when you put that key in your lock, you should feel like it’s home and not hell. You should feel it’s your sanctuary, not a war zone. We want to get schools also safe-certified, which bridges schools and homes. Because I have to say, and I’m a teacher. I’ve done teaching. I taught dance for 10 years and then served as a substitute teacher for 5 years. The troubled kids, the kids that are troublesome in school, the reason, most of the time, the reason why they’re troubled is that there’s abuse going on at home. 

We need to make that connection, that bridge. If the child is throwing things, screaming, getting into fights with other children, and there are problems at home, we need to address them at home. So that way it can be resolved at school. We are looking to make schools also safe, certified workplaces. 

I tried this several years ago, but it didn’t go anywhere, unfortunately. But I do want to revisit this hospital. Before you bring this baby home, you have to get certified, the parents, the mother, the father, the adoptive, whatever the case may be. Two mothers, two fathers, whether they’re married, whether they’re unmarried, whether they’re dating, they just gave birth, the mother and the father. Well, you need to get an ” oh so safe” certification before bringing this child home. Because that way, we see what we do: Cosmos is preventive rather than waiting for an episode of violence to occur. The baby is suffering. 

A statistic that I want to bring up is that five children a day are killed, murdered at the hands of abusive parents, and usually under the watch of a child protective service agency. In this country alone, five a day. There is no excuse for that. That is mind-boggling to me. So this is why. Oh, so safe certifications for properties. We believe we’re spearheading the real estate industry in moving in this direction: if we make respect a required standard in all homes on paper, educate everyone, have everyone sign the policy, and assign therapists to the property. 

There’s a therapist there you can go to as a resource. It becomes part of your residency and your home life. The horrible statistics we know would all be much worse. There would be such improvement, we believe, and children would be in a much better place than dealing with abuse, violence, chaos, and dysfunction. It’s ridiculous. We all deserve to be safe at home as well. Safe at home.

Cosmos: 

And Sabrina, if someone in the audience wants to connect with you and learn more about Ossosafe.com, how can they do so?

Sabrina Osso: 

Yes, the website is Ossosafe.com. We are on all the major social media platforms. Facebook, LinkedIn, Twitter, and Instagram are the two platforms that are specifically for children; the other two are TikTok and YouTube. Our book is sold on Amazon, and it’s Home Safe Home for you and me. It’s sold on Amazon and many other book-selling platforms, I’m happy to say. So those are the best ways to reach us.

Cosmos: 

No, thank you, Sabrina. And Sabrina, I’m so thankful that you took the time to enlighten us on this topic, because it needs to be. More light has to be shed upon this matter. 

I’m also glad you showed us how to overcome pain, transform it, and empower it, because with the right strategies for our minds and emotions, we can overcome any environment. I hope you can come to the show later.

Sabrina Osso: 

Yes, yes, thank you so much. We definitely would come back. Is that what you said? Like to come back? Yes, yes, definitely. Thank you for your time. It was so great to be here with you and your audience. It was enlightening for me, too, actually.

Cosmos: 

Yeah, likewise. And I want to conclude this episode by letting my fellow extraordinary Americans know that, hey, there’s an extraordinary within each of us. It’s our duty to awaken it and unleash it. Until next time, bye for now.